Alone:

What do I mean by me saying Im alone? Whenever I say it around people, they're always like "Well stop being such a douchebag to everyone else" or "Stop pushing away" --- The Second I've been doing, but I have no intention of accomplishing the first, ever.

I don't /care/ about having a bunch of people to open up to. I don't want a bunch of friends. Because I hate most people, and most people are just flat out not worth my fucking time. Period. Idgaf. If I think someone IS worth my time, I make it a point to make them feel like I'm not hostile towards them, and I make it a point to be friendly to them and actually try around them, because I value their continued existence in my life.

But. What do I do when the people in my life that I've decided to let in and trust, keep me at arms length?

I don't know. I really don't, and it hurts, but there's nothing I can do about it. I have trust issues, and it takes certain people for me to be able to trust anyone, and just. Ugh...

I wish I could fix things. More than anything in the world.